Jason had considered Castiel crazy. Castiel doesn't know this, and is therefore blissfully unaware that this was precisely why Jason had wanted to keep him around - thinking Castiel someone with just a few screws loose, clingy and dependent but not dangerous, and not illegal. How else would he be so sheltered, so clueless about so many things, so sweetly submissive when pressured just right. How desperate to please and not be sent away.
The cruelest punishments had been when Jason had started packing a bag for Castiel, silently threatening to get rid of him.
Castiel had begged on those days, too painfully reminded of being tossed out of Heaven, tossed out of the bunker, too.
Now, he just nods, too ashamed to apologize once more for putting this all on Sam, making Sam have to deal with him. They may be friends and he's still more than willing to die for the Winchesters, but he never intended to involve them in the failure of his sex life and relationship like this.
He wonders if Dean will consider him a baby again, an infant unable to take care of itself. Wonders if Sam might not secretly think the same, now that his thoughts are safe from Castiel's prying gaze.
"Are you going to be far?"
And he loathes himself for having to ask this question for his own comfort. Even worse...
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2014-11-07 11:32 pm (UTC)The cruelest punishments had been when Jason had started packing a bag for Castiel, silently threatening to get rid of him.
Castiel had begged on those days, too painfully reminded of being tossed out of Heaven, tossed out of the bunker, too.
Now, he just nods, too ashamed to apologize once more for putting this all on Sam, making Sam have to deal with him. They may be friends and he's still more than willing to die for the Winchesters, but he never intended to involve them in the failure of his sex life and relationship like this.
He wonders if Dean will consider him a baby again, an infant unable to take care of itself. Wonders if Sam might not secretly think the same, now that his thoughts are safe from Castiel's prying gaze.
"Are you going to be far?"
And he loathes himself for having to ask this question for his own comfort. Even worse...
"Are you going to lock me in?"