For your love, I'm sorry/For your pain, don't worry

[fromfryingpantofire]

It had been happening little by little. Almost small enough increments not to be noticed, but Sam and Dean were both masters of noticing little details. It was the line between life and death far too many times.

(At least when they wanted to. Both were entirely too good at not seeing the forest for the trees when it was something they didn't want to know about.)

It had been slow, but steady. Sam and Dean had their hunts and Castiel had his job and his own life separate from their own. Especially once he got a boyfriend. It was only natural that they didn't get a chance to meet up as often.

But it wasn't just that. More and more often, Castiel begged off from meeting up or simply didn't answer voicemails left for him. And when they were able to get together, Castiel was quieter and obviously pulling away. It was worrying and Sam and Dean sat down and talked about it in the bunker, even pulling Kevin into it. They all agreed that, even if there wasn't a problem, they needed to at least check up on the former angel.

Which was why Sam was outside the gas station in one of the cars from the Men of Letters' garage, waiting on Castiel to finish his shift. This was something that was better talked about in person, anyway.

((Content warning for discussions of abuse and abusive relationships. Also BDSM done wrong.))

Comments

[freetobe]

Castiel aches.

He's been on his feet the entire day, and while there's a certain humble sort of happiness to be found in his job - even the unsanitary parts of it - it's also exhausting, and serves to remind him how far he's fallen.

It's a blessing in disguise that he found Jason, that he has someone to ground him and help him anchor himself, lest it all become too much. Sometimes though, their arrangement weighs heavily on Castiel. He'll have to confess this tonight, and face the proper punishment for not being happy with what he has. It helps him. It's what he wants and needs, and Jason knows how to provide that. The rules change sometimes, but it's Castiel's fault for not keeping up, for now knowing simple human customs. Jason teaches him, and mosto f the time, Castiel does well.

Nevertheless, he's sore in more ways than one, new and old welts on the back of his thighs making work a bit difficult today, and more will certainly be added tonight. The plug is a little on the side of too big to be comfortable, but Jason asked him to push himself, so he does. They'll have guests over later tonight, and Castiel needs to make sure the apartment is presentable, and that he is presentable, too. There's a purpose to it, and while it lacks the humble kind of dignity the job at the gas station has, any purpose is better than no purpose at all.

Shift change brings an unpleasant surprise. Castiel is off the clock, and exits the gas station to see the last person he expected.

"Sam..." He looks surprised for a moment, maybe even worried, but then smiles at his friend. Jason doesn't like Sam and Dean. Jason expects him home soon. "What are you doing here?"